The Big One part 1

	With a stack smaller than his legendary member, Ron Jeremy busts out with Kings

It’s one of the most incredible sights in the world. It’s also one of the most demanding journalistic tasks known to man. It might not be as perilous as front-line reporting in the Middle East, but keeping track of the biggest poker tournament in the world is a feat deserving of more than a flak jacket. Welcome to the WSOP Main Event. Deep in the bowels of the Rio Casino, hundreds of tables and millions of poker chips are lying in wait. Almost 9,000 poker players have paid $10,000 each to take a shot at the biggest prize in sporting history and by the end of the gruelling 12-day No-Limit Hold’em marathon, the event will have created 12 millionaires and rewarded one lucky player with a $12m fortune.

All walks of life

In the ranks of the hopefuls lie a clutch of sporting legends, including the former undisputed Heavyweight Boxing Champion Lennox Lewis and six-time World Snooker Champion Steve Davis; a snatch of major and minor celebrities including James Garner, Tobey Maguire, Brian McFadden, Shannon Elizabeth, and Michael Greco; the best professional players in the world; and thousands of internet qualifiers. Each and every one is mingling, talking poker, eating pre-match burgers and dreaming of the coveted gold bracelet. This is, quite literally, the stuff that dreams are made of.

Armed with a dictaphone, notepad and pen, digital camera and a crate of Red Bull, my mission is to bring you all the action as it happens. And as it happens, this year’s Main Event is a story of big names falling, unknowns rising and a lot of pots of Gold. Shuffle up and deal…

Day 1A, 1B, 1C and 1D
Friday, July 28,
Saturday, July 29,
Sunday, July 30,
Monday, July 31

12.00
Shuffle up and deal! With $25/$50 blinds and starting stacks of $10,000, there are over 2,000 players in each flight and the aim is to get down to the 800 mark before play is stopped. It’s not going to be easy.

12.08
The tournament director delivers the good news: ‘Congratulations ladies and gentlemen you are not going to be the first player eliminated from this year’s WSOP. We have our first bust-out.’ The first player to do the ‘walk of shame’ is out after only a few minutes when his set of Threes are crushed by trip Jacks. Set over set is a bit unlucky.

13.05
Lots of action pre-flop with Sam Farha involved ends with Farha turning over a full house after making a set of Nines on a flop of 9♥-6♥-4♥ . Unbelievably, Joe Berry, who made his set of Sixes on the flop hits quads on the turn to eliminate Farha.

14.15
Phil Hellmuth arrives. He might be a drama queen but he’s got the presence and charisma to back it up – the atmosphere in the room is suddenly charged.

15.37
A player is disqualified when he’s caught putting chips in his pocket when his table’s broken up. He claims he was told he could do it but he’s still ejected because of the dangers of chip dumping and counterfeiting.

16.47

Phil Hellmuth is out of the tournament about two-and-a-half hours after he arrived. He had a run of bad luck (genuine this time), and is finally poleaxed when, short-stacked, he moves all-in with A-Q and comes up against a pair of Sevens.

17.25
PokerPlayer favourite Mike ‘The Mouth’ Matusow is knocked out, ensuring that this year’s Main Event will now be a lot less entertaining. Lots of pre-flop betting led to him moving all-in on a flop of 9♦-4♦-7♠. Matusow shows 7-7 for a set and his opponent shows K♦-J♦. The 3♦ arrives to flush Matusow out, leaving him (and us) very sad.

18.00
Antonio Esfandiari marks yet another big name elimination on Day 1 when his pocket Nines are cracked. He never really got going and was fairly short-stacked moving into the hand.

18.31
Lennox Lewis moves all-in on a flop of A-6-5, showing A-10. Cecilia Mortensen counters with A-Q and with a harmless one-two of a deuce on the turn and an Eight on the river, the lady knocks out the former boxing champion.

18.35
With a stack smaller than his legendary member, porn behemoth Ron Jeremy busts out with a pair of Kings to his opponent’s Aces. For the first time in his career, Jeremy fails to make the money (shot).

20.45
The first confrontation of the big boys sees top poker author Dan Harrington walking when his flopped J♥-7♥ flush is beaten by Mike Sexton’s Q♥-Q♣ after another heart drops on the turn. He’s given a huge round of applause and (presumably) returns to his hotel room to start work on his new book, which will probably show exactly why he played this hand correctly but just got unlucky.

21.45
Doyle Brunson tries to execute one of his legendary aggressive moves, pushing all-in with pocket Nines on a board of 10♣-10♦-6♣-5♣-7♠. His opponent thinks for a while but makes a good call with K♥-10♥. Texas Dolly is out and receives the acclaim he deserves from the remaining players and spectators.

23.15
Chip Reese, winner of the H.O.R.S.E. event can’t make it a legendary double as he busts out of the Main Event.

00.00
Chris Moneymaker is going to have to wait another year to prove his WSOP win wasn’t a fluke. He’s eliminated on the stroke of midnight.

00.20
Scott Fischman, who started the day regularly donating chips to HillyTheFish, is eliminated on Day 1. We spot him heading back to his hotel room looking extremely dejected. PP: What happened?
SF: I didn’t play well.

00.45
The Orient Express, Johnny Chan, is out. He moves all-in with A♦-6♣ and comes up against a pair of Jacks. ‘What could I do? I was short-stacked.’

01.55
Marcel Luske has been building up chips steadily all day but runs into trouble in the shape of Robert Varkonyi. He moves all-in with a set of Jacks and is looking in good shape to double-up against Varkonyi’s open-ended straight draw. But he hits a Nine – one of eight outs – and Luske is gone.

02.45
Gus Hansen is another big name casualty when his pocket Sixes are cracked by an opponent holding A♥-7♦.

02.58
Day 1C comes to an end with 867 players left.

03.06
HillyTheFish nearly comes a cropper on the last hand of the day. Dealt A-K out of position he flat-calls world champ Hachem’s raise on the feature table, as does another player. As the announcement’s made that play is over for the end of Day 1D, Hachem tells HillyTheFish and his other opponent, ‘They’re all through, but you aren’t yet.’ A harmless-looking flop comes, but HillyTheFish checks and folds to Hachem’s next bet. Which is just as well, as Hachem, who is holding 4-2 offsuit ends up making quad Twos by the turn. He takes about half the other player’s stack – and all because the guy didn’t re-raise with pocket Queens pre-flop. Around 900 players remain.

03.12
Play ends on Day 1A and 1B. Less than 800 of the original 2,138 players are left from Day 1A and less than 900 are still standing (well, seated) from Day 1B.